Stop Chasing Men | How to Attract a Man Without Trying So Hard



     hello  welcome to your great life where I share with ambitious conscious heart centered and successful women like you how you can attract the kind of quality men you want and step into the most alive feminine version of you without the need for gimmicks manipulation or crazy techniques now if you've noticed as I said in my intro that you've been chasing men and the kind of connections that you get to create a service Alta chasing men is guys who are not really interested in pursuing you then I'm going to suggest a cup of alternatives to start stop doing that stop chasing men and then what you can do instead to get a lot better results with men so first the definition what is chasing men chasing men is heavily pursuing a guy mostly initiating contact with him mostly following up when he hasn't responded to your initial or initiation messages taking upon yourself to ask him out on dates paying for the dates taking all the masculine role in the pursuit of dating dynamic now so as much as I'm asking you to stop doing that I'm asking you to stop pursuing men either the difference between chasing and pursuing to me is chasing has a much more heavy needy connotation than pursuing pursuing would be more elegant way to go about it where neediness is not the primary force that's driving that interaction but still something that I highly discourage you to do as a woman now before I go forward let me share with you this message this video isn't for everyone if you're the kind of woman who prefers initiating who prefers pursuing a guide you're the kind of woman who prefers taking him on versus being taken if you prefer for lack of better metaphorical connotation penetrating someone emotionally physically versus being penetrated emotionally physically then you should not listen to my video move on if you are however like the vast majority of women I've connected with who in their heart of hearts despite the fact that they might be very powerful in their work prefer to be pursued prefer to be the quartet versus having to do that then this message for you so what do you do instead of chasing a guy that's what you've been doing a pursuing man if you haven't taken it to the extreme of chasing well the first step is you want to make it a point to shine more frequently that means a deeper expression of your emotions and heart to practice being more open to connect from that place of shiney openness and to lean back so that's the first step the first step is figure out a way to reconnect and I've been saying this in most of my videos recently to reconnect to your radiance to open 5% more 10% more 2% more even and from that place figure out what's possible what can happen why do I say this as a first step because if you're more open if you're more radiant you will have exponentially more options at your disposal then if you're going at it from a cynical closed-off map perspective now after point number one point number two is defined what kind of man you want in this specific dynamic the dynamic I'm talking about is do you want a man who knows what he wants who is willing to put in the energy to pursue you not chase you because you don't want a guy who chases you you want a guy who pursues you if you want a guy who pursues you a guy who is asking you out on dates versus you asking him out on dates the guy who when the dinner check arrives he takes out his wallet and paste without waiting for you to do that if you prefer for a guy to open your door versus you open up his door if you prefer for a man to take the initiative and the leadership role in this getting to know each other dynamic then the fine that's what you want if that's not what you want as I said earlier no need to even listen to the next few steps because once you're clear on what you want then you can more clearly say this man who is not doing that and it's not whether to step up into doing that is not for me might be good for somebody else but not for that the want the craving that I have in my heart number three is create more options why do I want you to create more options because something that happens very frequently is you connect with a man you'll like him you feel chemistry you kiss him and he's a great kisser and then you cut off all other options we for vetting him before knowing he was a good friend before knowing he really wants a long-term relationship before knowing what his thoughts are and family marriage important things that would make it a showstopper for you if he believes differently than you do and if you don't create more options then it's gonna be hard for you to lean back because if that guy doesn't show up and all of a sudden you have nothing you're back at square zero but if you have more options then it's going to be easier not to have to play a game but to simply relax and say if he's not showing up here's three other guys who are showing up and have one rise to the top in terms of connection and friendship compatible number four is state your preferences guys have been punched in the face and the heart emotionally multiple times and many times not don't know how to act sometimes they have some habits that are not necessarily helpful for the dynamic of dating sometimes they have stepped into more of the masculine role and women have shut them down so if you're a woman who's more on your feminine and you prefer for a guy to take the leadership position of courting you and pursuing you than when he connects with you ask him a simple question what makes you feel excited about dating a woman have him sure what he wants and then share what you want say I love it when a guy takes the leadership role of pursuing not chasing because you're not desperate you don't necessarily need me to for your happiness but a guy who was willing to be courageous step up as a man and lead that means initiating contact that means asking out on dates not saying that you have to do that I'm saying that's how I thrive on the date dynamic once you've established that once you've clearly voiced out but that's your preference he can either say I've have mal permission to do that and I'm gonna do it more or I don't like it I want you to pursue me just as much in which case you have two options one is saying yes I'll do that or option two I'm gonna move on and connect with a guy who's gonna take out more of that leadership role in the dating dynamic and not is that it's not politically correct thing to say I know and if you want to throw tomatoes at me how about it metaphorically speaking what I'm saying to you right now is regardless of what if you're one of those human beings who believe this relationship thing is 50/50 I'm gonna say that doesn't work I haven't seen that work it's a hundred a hundred but not in the exact same way it's not I pay for ten dates you pay for ten dates maybe the dynamic is something more of opposites attract each other in some way maybe it's more of your masculine attracts feminine there's a polarity in the type of dynamic you can establish with a man and that's what I'm talking about if in your heart of hearts you prefer for a guy to show up stronger then it's okay even if your friends have told you that's weak even if your friends have told you you should do the same if you like a guy ask him out on a date I'm saying don't do that because it's unnecessary to get to the type of relationship you want I'm not saying don't show up I'm not saying don't be radiant because that's your share of the equation but if you're showing up with radiance and an open heart and vulnerability the counterpart to that is a guy who knows what he wants and it's initiating and connecting with you asking you out on dates and moving the needle forward number six number five I'm sorry is evaluate once you state your preferences once you know I value eight does a guy step up are you compatible with them is he showing up strong is she showing a weight weak is he consistent its econ cold and then step number six is mega determination if you want to progress because it's going in the right direction if you need to recalibrate or if you need to move on because the type of connection that he has with you is not the one you're seeking now let me be clear when I say this not every guy can do it this way and not every guy feels this is the right way many guys are gonna feel this is the wrong way to do it I'm asking you right now to first define for yourself how do you want to date and if your preference for dating is this type of dynamic where you're not chasing men you're not pursuing men men are not chasing you but they are pursuing you then it's worth it for you to express what you want and move forward from men who can't do it this way hope this is helpful insightful and useful to you in some way if it is I'm gonna ask you do they thinks number one first line on the description of this video I've created a free masterclass that shows you how you can step into the kind of relationship you want avoiding unnecessary pain all you do is click on the first link enter your name and email and you can start watching that free masterclass right away the next two things I'm asking if you enjoy this click like or thumbs up on this video and subscribe to my channel so that you can watch videos as they come out click the little bell if you want to be notified of new episodes thank you so much for connecting with me unless always I challenge you to live a full make lunches life you